1. Wear dull colours so you don’t stand out in the crowd .
2. Do Not make any sudden movements that might draw attention to yourself.
3. Try not to engage the record shop guy in conversation above monosyllables… he’s very fond of the sound of his own voice but is no match for your superior intelligence.
3.Brush and /or tie back your hair… neither the record shop guy or his other customers want those dreads dangling on the stock.
4. Don’t forget your glasses… squinting like that can only make your eyesight worse… if those wrinkles get much deeper your forehead will collapse behind your cheekbones and your mono brow will become a moustache.
5. Carry a hanky… that is a booger… right there dude… it’s huge!….no wait… it’s a spider…nope …just nose hair, but carry a hanky any way.
6. Never threaten to sue the record shop guy for doing a caricature of you in a student newspaper in the late 80s…he’ll never let it go.
…Hi Steve…. miss you.