In Case Of Fire

….first remove motorcycle from fire hydrant…

 

…(I’ve been walking past this tableau, on the way to work, for a number of weeks now…this is the bike owners best attempt yet at blocking access to a clearly marked fire hydrant….I despair at his/her lack of knowledge of the rules of the road – let alone common sense…sure you’re gonna be outside to shift your bike if your house is on fire…aren’t you?….shall I mention the lack of vigilance on the part of our local law enforcement representatives…naah..they’re probably filling out a report even as we speak…mmm…society…we’re fucked).

The Correct Use Of Bath

 

…mmmm….seafood.

You Should Never Think It Is Safe To Go Back In The Water

 

 

 

…ever.

Mad Cow Disease

….aaah….1990, when all we had to worry about was our brains turning to swiss cheese because we’d eaten processed beef in the UK….

 

…they were simpler times.

But Cereally Folks

 

 

…I hope they have “Crunchy Clusters” where you are….

…otherwise that last line won’t make sense.

…(or maybe it’s best you don’t know what they are in case I put you off finishing that box you have in the cupboard).

So Many Questions

…so little time…

 

…especially if Oy-Oy is on your doorstep.

 

…(I worked on these characters for 4 years, on & off, with Cornelius Stone…love the way he works…screeds of scripts…pick and choose what you can work with…add and subtract dialogue/stage directions/reality at will…this first 3 pager arrived in the mail as a typed (not word processed) questionnaire, no explanation, nothing….I think it came together nicely…aaaand I’m led to believe Mr. Stone is once again working with these characters…wish I had the time & brain space to play…who knows, if the right questionnaire turned up in my mail box….maybe in the form of 25th anniversary debrief….I might not be able to resist…. ).

Thats Not How It Goes

 

…because that’s not the outcome we signed up for…

…(although, as far as final resting places go, it looks quite comfy).

Here’s A Story For You

….so this guy gets Corn’ Stone (circa 1990) enthused about this international publication thing where kids from around the world design a character (with a brief outline of what that character is about, I think), these characters get farmed out to writers from other countries and they, in turn, pass them on to artists….

…as far as I’m aware Corn’ wrote his usual landslide of stuff and passed it around the Razor Press stable…and we dutifully produced the art work….who wouldn’t, international publication…full colour…encouraging kids to do creative stuff…

…fame, fortune, and karmic bonus points for all….

 

…then the guy collects up all the original art work and disappears in to the “we-are-the world-do-they -know-its-xmas” ether…never to be seen again….

 

…asshole….

…I’m lucky…this was my first full colour sequential piece… we had to provide separated text pages (pre-photo shop!!!) to facilitate dropping translations into the art….I took (primitive) colour copies of the pages so I could cut in the text and see what it look liked as a finished piece….

… most of the folk who contributed never saw their artwork again….

…this is the first time this has been published…

…if you’ve seen this before, let me know where…

…I’ll fetch my stick.

Our Environment

…is full of stuff

 

…your stuff, my stuff, stuff that came outta an octopuss…

…in a can.

Corrective Surgery

…not available to all.